My Monday Heart
The morning seems the usual but not myself. I am kind of feeling the hang over from last night's emotional outbreak. It is not too much, but there is certainly something that broke.
It was already late as I got up. Rushing myself for breakfast and preparations etceteras.
My sister who stayed with me weekdays with her kids had quickly put my meal at my lunchbox, which i enjoyed, 'cause ever since who knows when i never experienced that much thought.
I knew I am going to be late. But I tried to stay as cool as possible to protect myself from sweating too much, which is not good if I will enter the office on monday looking exhausted.
Heavy traffic. As usual, it is monday madness. As the vehicle towards the train station slowly move forward I still feel very sleepy, so I closed my eyes wishing it will make me relax a little, but my thoughts and my heart is as loud as a car horning behind the vehicle i'm riding, and it's irritating.
I ran towards the platform as soon as I pass the turnstile of Katipunan station hoping to make the earliest possible time to reach the office. But as I get there it seems like the train has just passed so I have to wait for another few minutes.
Waiting, in any sense, is as natural for me as breathing.
As i waited i was thinking of last night's happening. Thank God for a friend who has accompanied me the late sunday afternoon to hear mass and spend the night for a talk on how everything's going. I didn't share much cause i know she already felt how i was feeling and it will make her bore to death if I still talk about it. It was usual of me talking to her that topic again and again and again that I don't have to bring it up because even before i speak, she knows what I am thinking. But instead of resolving what seem to be an issue I decided
to lighten up the topic and bring the spotlight to a much happier talk. That moment i chose happiness. But not til i went home.
Everyone asleep as I lie at my bed. I can't get over the ache, it is more than my want to be happy, or at least just my need to sleep. I prayed. I cried. I imagined I am sleeping.
Then i'm on the platfrom again, i realized my mind just flew in somewhere.
and i turned to see who's on my side.Tthere she was. What seemed to be a dream suddenly
came here with me. I recognize her, I saw her twice and remember even share a trip once going at the very station we're in. This is the fourth time I've seen her and get this close. Suddenly this stranger mean something to me. I glanced at her but she don't seem to care, she look straight to where the train will be coming out. And as soon as the train arrives I followed her as she pass the door, but in a moment she's gone, covered with the crowd.
I tried to look behind as i went out the train hoping to have a glimpse of her pretty face.
For a while my heart whisper something it never say before. I heard the smoother voice of my heart rather than the loud aching it cries the night before.
The struggles seem to take it rest for that moment or just as i thought, a new will arise.
I am a Spontaneous Idealist
http://www.ipersonic.com/type/SI.html" target="blank" title ="My personality type: the spontaneous idealist. Take the free iPersonic personality test!">
http://i280.photobucket.com/albums/kk161/ipersonic/SI.png" border="0" alt="My personality type: the spontaneous idealist. Take the free iPersonic personality test!" />http://counters.gigya.com/wildfire/CIMP/bT*xJmx*PTEyMTQ1NTU*MjAwNzgmcHQ9MTIxNDU1NTg4NzYwOSZwPTQ2NjIxJmQ9Jm49bXVsdGlwbHkmZz*x.jpg" />
Spontaneous Idealist (SI)
Spontaneous Idealists are creative, lively and open-minded persons. They are humorous and dispose of a contagious zest for life. Their enthusiasm and sparkling energy inspires others and sweeps them along. They enjoy being together with other people and often have an uncanny intuition for their motivations and potential. Spontaneous Idealists are masters of communication and very amusing and gifted entertainers. Fun and variety are guaranteed when they are around. However, they are sometimes somewhat too impulsive in dealing with others and can hurt people without really meaning to do so, due to their direct and sometimes critical nature.
This personality type is a keen and alert observer; they miss nothing which is going on around them. In extreme cases, they tend to be oversensitive and exaggeratedly alert and are inwardly always ready to jump. Life for them is an exciting drama full of emotionality. However, they quickly become bored when things repeat themselves and too much detailed work and care is required. Their creativity, their imaginativeness and their originality become most noticeable when developing new projects and ideas - they then leave the meticulous implementation of the whole to others. On the whole, Spontaneous Idealists attach great value to their inner and outward independence and do not like accepting a subordinate role. They therefore have problems with hierarchies and authorities.
If you have a Spontaneous Idealist as your friend, you will never be bored; with them, you can enjoy life to the full and celebrate the best parties. At the same time, they are warm, sensitive, attentive and always willing to help. If Spontaneous Idealists have just fallen in love, the sky is full of violins and their new partners are showered with attention and affection. This type then bubbles over with charm, tenderness and imagination. But, unfortunately, it soon becomes boring for them once the novelty has worn off. Boring everyday life in a partnership is not for them so that many Spontaneous Idealists slip from one affair into another. However, should the partner manage to keep their curiosity alive and not let routine and familiarity gain the upper hand, Spontaneous Idealists can be inspiring and loving partners.
the twenty minute nothingness.
Got this from Jaja. Lunchbreak. What better things to do but relax. Pasagot ah. hehe.
1) ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT? - on my right hand, npaso sa kawali ng fishball habang tumutusok ako. haha. pasensiya bata. maliit pa ko nun. haha.
2) WHAT IS ON THE WALLS OF YOUR ROOM? -chalk grafitti since walang paint yung room i did my own. pero mabubura na siya dahil sa moist ng ulan nitong nakaraang araw. haha.
3) WHAT TYPE OF MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO? - I enjoy altrernative and rnb.
4) DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN? - according to my nanay it's tanghali so I guess around 2pm.
5) WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW? - someone ^_^
6) WHAT/WHO DO YOU MISS? - highschool
7) WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION? - the cross (which i'm wearing today) my mom gave, nothing expensive but it means a lot.
8) DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC? - Nope
9) DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK? - Not really, I mean it depends if the place is really creepy, ops how would I know its dark? stupid. haha.
10) THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY. - loneliness. ops emo. tae. haha.
11) WHAT’S YOUR WORST FEAR? - I am living my fear but hope had the courage to turn it all 180.
12) WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF PROPOSING/BEING PROPOSED AT? - somewhere serene
13) COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINK? -Coffee
14) FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?- everything!!!! i love pizza!!!!
15) IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE? - since i've thought of pizze, well yeah, stuffed pizza at sbarro.
16) FAVORITE COLOR OF ALL TIME? - white, is it a color?!
17) WHAT WAS THE FIRST MEANINGFUL GIFT YOU’VE RECEIVED? - ref cake (crema de fruta) by ghie and abby. it's the first and last time i've ever received such labor of love haha.
18) FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND? - f&h
19) WHO IS THE HOTTEST FEMALE/MALE CELEBRITY? - anne curtis.
20) DO YOU HAVE A PET RIGHT NOW? - nah.
21) WHAT KIND IS IT? -
22) WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING? - ergh. i don't wanna fall for someone who leaves
23) HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE USA? -nah
24) YOUR WEAKNESS? - hotness. haha. yeah a different type of. haha.
25) MET ANYONE FAMOUS? -Yeah, in our field.
26) FIRST JOB? - architectural assistant at jsla
27) EVER DONE A PRANK CALL? - i knew someone, i'm at her side while doing this. haha.
28) DO YOU THINK EVERYONE OUT THERE HAS A SOULMATE? -i dopn't know. if you believe, maybe.
29) WHAT DID YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT THE MOST? - style?! and my graphics.
30) HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? - maybe next year hopefully
31) WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY? - laptop maybe.
32) WHAT’S YOUR ALL TIME FAVORITE MOVIE? - Wicker Park
33) WHO’S YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? - Paulo Coelho and Bob Ong
34) WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? -Yeah. the mighty Julius Ceasar. haha.
35) WHAT KIND OF SHAMPOO DO YOU USE? - clear
36) ARE YOU A JEALOUS PERSON? - no.
37) HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER? - music and art
38) WHAT’S YOUR MAIN GOAL IN LIFE? - Touch lives. ^__^
39) WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? - computer, yes i'm a ms paint addict ever since grade 5. i mean all the boys are playing outside while i am inside our house drawing buildings and sketching animes. autistic. haha.
40) DO YOU USE SARCASM? - sometimes.hahahaha
41) WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW OF ALL TIME? - friends
42) DO YOU HAVE ALL YOUR FINGERS AND TOES? - yes
43) WHERE WOULD YOU GO IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE? -europe really.
44) WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU HAD ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD? - shop and travel and donate. see i'm good. haha.
45) HAVE YOU EVER DREAMED OF BECOMING A MOVIE STAR? -during highschool. haha.
46) HAVE YOU EVER FELT SUICIDAL? - During my younger years since i'm kinda autistic i actually could have but i'm too wise to say no. haha.
47) THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX - smile (the face, eyes , lips...everythings there.. i think...haha)
48) FAVORITE THING TO HATE - nuclear weapons!!!
49) FAVORITE WORD - love
50) DO YOU A HAVE A TATTOO? -nah
51) HAVE YOU EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING? - na ah.
52) IF YOU WERE SOMEONE ELSE, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOURSELF? - yep
53) WHAT’S YOUR BIGGEST FRUSTRATION? - to be a musician. haha. seryoso ko dito. haha.
54) HAVE YOU EVER REALLY AND TRULY HAD A BESTFRIEND? -how'd you say someone's your bestfriend?
55) REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT? - not applicable.
56) KISSES OR HUGS? -Hugs!
57) RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS? -Relationship
58) DO YOU HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM OR HIGH SELF-ESTEEM? -low i guess. have to work it out though.
59) WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? -The Bible (a must) and Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
60) DESCRIBE YOUR LOVE LIFE - zero.
